entry seven/ Stop being so emotional!

I was given an assignment several months ago on the importance of Emotional Intelligence in the Workplace. Here is my best shot on some practical and reasonable ideas.

The phrase “emotional intelligence” has been the topic of discussion in the workplace for many years. Having a strong sense of what emotional intelligence actually means can strengthen one’s work ethic and make for a positive work environment. So what does emotional intelligence mean, exactly? Most definitions will say that emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize different behaviors, moods, and characteristics of ourselves and others, and being able to cope with those situations in an appropriate manner. Jeffrey Royer stresses that “emotional intelligence not only contributes to successful careers and relationships, but deficiencies in basic emotional abilities can leans to poor mental and physical health.” (Royer, 1996). Emotional intelligence requires empathy, understanding, and self-awareness. If we are in a work environment where other individuals are involved, we are also dealing with other personalities and emotions. Being able to effectively and confidently adapt and manage emotions while in the workplace may be a difficult task to take on, but will prove beneficial and rewarding in the grand scheme of things.

Emotions play an important role in how we are as humans. The way we manage our emotions will directly affect others around us in our work environments. Karin Applegate, Aysegul Timur, and Karen Locklear make it imperative that emotional intelligence is necessary. “Recognizing the importance for management to retain employees who are emotionally intelligent is critical in developing an environment that is conducive to employees.” (Applegate, Timur, & Locklear, 2009, 43). Having positive skills in emotional intelligence typically leads to higher performance rates in the workplace. People who have emotional intelligence will naturally become more effective leaders. Daniel Goleman, a psychologist who focused greatly on the study of emotional intelligence, said, “If your emotional abilities aren’t in hand, if you don’t have self-awareness, if you are not able to manage your distressing emotions, if you can’t have empathy and have effective relationships, then no matter how smart you are, you are not going to get very far.” (Hughes, Goleman researched and focused on emotional intelligence and its importance in the workplace. He came up with five major qualities and traits that define and detail emotional intelligence. The next few paragraphs will go into detail on Goleman’s perspectives.

The first quality of emotional intelligence is self-awareness. Self-awareness is defined by Webster’s dictionary as “an awareness of one’s own personality or individuality.” Those who are self-aware are able to recognize their abilities and actions in an honest and truthful manner, and look at their lives in an objective manner. An individual who is self-aware can recognize their emotions and is capable of managing them in a work environment. In an article titled Developing and Applying Emotional Intelligence, Debbie Schacter noted the importance of being self-aware in a work environment when it comes to making work-related decisions. “The role of emotional intelligence in decision making is now also understood to be important, leading to more value being placed upon personal competencies in the areas of self-awareness and self-regulation.” (Schachter, 2009, 49). It is important to recognize that everyone is human and therefore, will experience outside stress and difficult situations. Being able to handle these stresses internally without suffering in the workplace will benefit not only that individual, but also those around them.

The next trait Goleman presents is the ability to manage a mood or emotion. This quality is directly correlated with being a self-aware individual. When we are going through particularly difficult situations, it is imperative to be realistic and positive, especially when we are at work. We have to manage our stress in order to be emotionally intelligent human beings. Along with managing stress is the ability to maintain a level of self-control in emotional situations. When there is a disruption in the day or an uncomfortable situation occurs, the level of intelligence we have emotionally will matter.

Motivation is another important key to healthy emotional intelligence. It is important to make achievable goals. In this day and age, there is very little job security. With that said, individuals who show a high level of self-motivation and initiative will go far. Showing the readiness to jump on any opportunities without being asked to shows immense levels of emotional intelligence. It also shows a level of commitment to a place of work.

The final two traits to have for positive levels of emotional intelligence are that of empathy and handling other relationships. Being empathetic is often forgot about in the workplace. We often forget that other people are going through life situations outside of the workplace. Showing empathy is having the ability to understand and relate to the needs and wants of others. It is important and rewarding to be aware of others’ feelings and concerns. By achieving this, we are actively showing an interest in those around us. It is often forgotten that we are spending a large amount of time not only with friends and family, but with people we work with. We have a great opportunity to build those relationships by showing empathy and consideration.

In an articled written by Mike Poskey called The Importance of Emotional Intelligence in the Workplace, having well-rounded skills was largely stressed. He focused on several businesses that were successful because of their focus on emotional intelligence. Job turnover was reduced in a large hospital after an emotional intelligence screening was incorporated. Fortune 500 companies were able to yield better results after introducing emotional intelligence education to their employees. “All of these cases are starting to prove the value of having highly emotionally intelligent employees make up your workforce if you want a competitive advantage in this highly competitive business world.” (Poskey). Having skills related to being emotional intelligent are noticed in the workplace. It is essential to not only have the necessary skills to be successful in your prospective job, but to also be highly skilled emotionally. Working with people means working with emotions, so we need to be capable of dealing with anything that is thrown our way.

I was very intrigued by all the information I found by researching emotional intelligence, but felt as if I was lacking some more personal results. Because of this, I decided to list some questions and scenarios to take to my co-workers. I currently work for Aveda, and I am one of seven employees (all being female) in our specific store. We are all very close since we are spending so much time together every week. As a result, we are also sharing personal life experiences, struggles, and emotional stresses. I felt that by asking these questions and sharing some scenarios, it would encourage us to strive to a higher balance of emotional intelligence that would benefit each one of us, including our customers. And since we know that people who are emotionally competent tend to be more successful and perform better, I felt that discussing these thoughts and ideas would encourage my co-workers as well.

For my method of research, I came up with a set of questions pertaining to outside stress, conflict management and resolution, and difficult emotional scenarios. It seemed as though the results for all the women I work with was very similar. Everyone felt that being emotionally intelligent would make for a more successful and well-rounded employee, as well as someone in a leadership position. Most of the women ranked empathy high in how we relate to each other. Everyone was on the same page about the levels of balance we should have as emotionally intelligent people. I received positive feedback about incorporating education about emotional intelligence and how it could be used to benefit every employee.

Emotional intelligence is crucial to making any company or business successful. Working with other individuals and other personalities can be a difficult task, but learning the right ways to communicate will benefit everyone. Goleman stresses the importance of being well rounded in the five qualities of successful emotional intelligence. Self-awareness is having the ability to identify an emotion when it is happening. It is the ability to know oneself honestly and truthfully. The next quality is the ability to manage oneself. It is the idea that we have the power to keep emotions and inclinations in check. It is also our ability to adapt to any situation and handle change. Goleman states the next trait is motivation, which is where our goals and achievements lie. Our desire to meet certain personal and career goals comes directly from how we can motivate ourselves. Empathy is an important trait that helps us understand and relate to those around us. We are not only aware of our personal issues and abilities, but we are gaining a sense of the needs and desires of others. The last quality listed is having a basic set of social skills, or being able to relate to one another. Being able to communicate effectively and being open and honest with others is key to working in any sort of work environment.

Having these characteristics as personality traits not only in the workplace, but also in every day situations, will encourage growth and leaderships skills. It is crucial in this day and age of competition and recession that we are highly skilled in not only our craft, but also our emotions. Being able to show a high level of adaptability and empathy will aid us in standing out in the job market.

References

Applegate, K., Timur, A., & Locklear, K.. (2009). Linking Self-Perception and Emotional Intelligence. The Business Review, Cambridge, 13(1), 43-52. Retrieved September 20, 2010, from ABI/INFORM Global. (Document ID: 1778504631).

Hughes, D. (n.d.). Interview with Daniel Goleman. Retrieved from http://www.shareguide.com/Goleman.htm

Poskey, M.G. (n.d.). The importance of emotional intelligence in the workplace. Retrieved from http://www.hodu.com/EQ.shtml

Royer , J.S. (1996). Emotional intelligence and the work place. Retrieved from http://agecon.unl.edu/royer/emotions.htm

Schachter, D.. (2009, July). Developing and Applying Emotional Intelligence. Information Outlook, 13(5), 49-50. Retrieved September 20, 2010, from Research Library. (Document ID: 1850585481).

entry six/Reevaluation my favorite film

Amélie is an eccentric French film from director Jean-Pierre Jeunet. Not only does Amélie charm you with her whimsical and peculiar antics, the cinematography and music score will overload you with happiness. If reading subtitles doesn’t bother you, then I highly recommend Amélie, not only for the charismatic story, but also for the beautiful picture and setting. The cinematography is filled with bright greens and deep reds, and feels like a huge painting. Jeunet appointed Yann Tierson to create the entire soundtrack, which was filled with piano driven and accordion filled pieces. Jeunet has a special talent of telling a charming story and actually allowing us to feel like we are right in the middle of Paris.

Amélie, played by French actress Audrey Tautou, was raised by two odd parents, and spends her childhood playing make-believe with imaginary friends. Her mother died of an accidental death when she was quite young, which made her father emotionally unavailable. Despite her rather peculiar upbringing, Amélie grows up to be somewhat “normal”, living alone in the city working as a waitress at the local café in Montmartre. At a pivotal moment in her adult life, Amélie discovers a lost box of treasures and memories from the tenant who lived in her apartment long before she was born. She decides in this moment that she will return the box, and if the owner is moved by seeing these old memories, she will from there on vow to enhance the lives of those around her. The film follows Amélie in her quest to bring joy to her lonely father, who’s dream was to travel the world but was never able to because of a misdiagnosis of the health of Amélie’s heart. She helps a hypochondriac co-worker find love, and plays mischievous tricks on a mean man who owns the local vegetable cart. But something is still missing for Amélie. She quickly discovers that her heart needs to find love.

During this time of mischief and adventure, she encounters Nino Quincampoix, played by Mathieu Kassovitz. Nino has lost his prized collection of discarded photos from photo booths, and Amélie finds the album. She plays a game of hide-and-seek with Nino, and in the midst, falls in love with him. She is too scared to reveal her true feelings, and Nino is too timid to express his feelings as well. Amélie is given sound advice from an old neighbor, whom she calls “The Glass Man”. He tells her “So, my little Amélie, you don’t have bones of glass. You can take life’s knocks. If you let this chance pass, eventually your heart will become as dry and brittle as my skeleton. So, go get him, for Pete’s sake!”

Simply put, Amélie is a wonderfully made movie that all should enjoy. Tautou captures the hearts of her audience. We are on the edge of our seats, hoping all of the goodness Amélie is spreading will surely come back to her. The kindness that one person can have for others is contagious, and her creative way of spreading this joy is exciting to the eye.

entry five/The tradition of Lent

Lent began yesterday, on Ash Wednesday, ending on Easter in April. I have never participated in Lent before, but something in me decided this year would be a good time to start. The tradition roots back the age of Jesus, and many denominations still continue the practice today. It is a time of prayer, cleansing, self-denial, rebirth. It typically last 40 days, in which one fasts from something in order to begin the cleansing process.

I have little will power when it comes to a couple of things...candy. and sweet. I just have a sweet tooth, what can I say? I'd pick m&ms any day of the week. Why not, during this time of self-denial and rebirth, give up the one thing I have little strength over?

As of day two, I'm doing fine. It may be due to the fact that I've been under the weather for the last few days and nothing sounds appealing or appetizing right now. I'm excited for the road ahead, may it be silly to give up such a small thing as candy and sweets. But for me, it is a huge undertaking. My patience and will power will be tested. I know it will not only be good for my body, but for my mind and spirit as well.

Here's to the next 38 days!

entry four/ Cleaning House

Confrontation doesn't necessarily have to be associated with negativity. Though it can be a challenge for an employer, it empowers them to create a more successful and efficient place of business. There are several different methods for conflict resolution in the workplace. Our assignment gives a perfect example of something I'm sure we have all experienced at one job or another. The behavior and attitude of one employee can cause a negative ripple effect to everyone in the workplace. The following is a situation describing how to effectively handle an employee is not meeting requirements and expectations.

As an employer at a medium sized tech service company, I have recently been informed by not only several of my employees but also several customers that one of my employees is causing turmoil in the workplace. It is my responsibility to handle the situation and get the issue under control. Since this is not a matter to be handled publicly, I bring the employee (let's call her "Jane") into my office for a more private discussion. This way, I am able to respect the privacy of my employee. I feel that the best way to handle this specific situation is to directly address the matters at hand. If this complaint was only given by a customer or two, I might be a little bit more lenient in how I handle the situation. But since this is a matter of office management, and since Jane has caused disruption in our own office, it is a more serious matter. I would first start the conversation by explaining why I brought her in so she is fully aware of the severity of the situation. Since Jane is also one of my own employees, I want her to feel comfortable sharing any problems or issues she has so that we can get down to the root of the situation. If there is anything hindering her from excellent customer service, I want to work together to find a better solution. After listening to Jane, I would go forward with a written reprimand, explaining that if there is no improvement in customer service or office relations within a certain timeframe, that this could be grounds for termination.

I can anticipate that Jane will probably be upset about the write up. Since I have already spoken to her a little on any issues she might have, I will, again, open up the floor to any questions or concerns Jane has for me. The key to a positive work environment is communication, and I want to genuinely meet any needs Jane may have to make this workplace a positive one for her. After giving her the floor to speak, I will set up a follow up meeting to evaluate Jane's progress.

Like I mentioned before, it is crucial to communicate positively and effectively in the workplace. Without it, there is little respect or concern for others.

entry three/media in our world

Technology in the media is ever growing and creating a huge impact on our society. There are countless outlets for which we can stay connected with.

Social networking is an enormous industry. It has been growing more and more in the last decade, with sites like FaceBook, Twitter, MySpace, and even Blogspot and other blog communities. We are able to connect with people on social and professional levels, as well as building communities based on location and interest. I know when I was planning my wedding last year, using outlets like blogs was extremely helpful in finding resources and ideas. There are countless people using these types of networks to express their creativity and interesting thoughts and ideas. People are networking all over the world for free or very little cost, and are able to connect with tons of people they would have never been able to connect with on a somewhat regular basis.

Another great media resource are video and photo sharing sites like YouTube, Hulu, Flickr, and Photobucket. These types of sites are used for those with a more narrowed interest. Photographers are able to utilize these sites to share their creative work with others. I was able to use Snapfish, a photo sharing website, to share photos with family and friends after our wedding. That way, I was saving tons of money on printing cost, and we weren't wasting paper by printing tons of photos. Anyone who I shared the site with was able to go on and print whatever photo they wanted from our wedding. YouTube is also another popular website that has multiple purposes. It can used for fun or for educational purposes. People are allowed to share home videos for anyone to view, as well as sharing knowledge of a specific trade or craft. I've seen parents showing funny videos of their kids being silly, as well as watching clips from political debates from years past. There is freedom in posting, which can pose danger if not monitored.

E-books have become extremely popular, with products like the Kindle, iPad, and Google Reader. If you have this hardware, you are able to download tons of books at a low cost. With this ability, there is more convenience and more accessibility. I am still undecided about this type of media outlet. On one side of the coin, the convenience is a plus. You are able to download a book and begin reading it within seconds, plus there's unlimited storage and space. On the other hand, I love paper and books. Maybe that's me being a romantic, but I want to hold the book in my hands and turn the pages. I end up having two or three books in my bag at a time, and I'm ok with taking up that space!

Last but definitely not least, radio and television have been at the forefront of media for a long time. They are also a fairly convenient form of media, since most people are able to access both of these. With radio and television, you are able to receive news and updates, as well as the latest in entertainment, music, sports, and education. There is an extremely broad audience, and programming for whoever is listening.

entry two/of Paris and such.

This entry is brought with an incredibly excited heart. My sweet husband of roughly 9 months surprised me with an amazing adventure for Valentine's day. Our one year anniversary is at the end of May, so what better opportunity then to travel to Paris! Cela est étonnant! (How amazing!) I speak little French, so as excited as I am, I am also a bit intimidated. Intimidation aside, I'm looking forward to the boulangerie, or the bakery! I can't wait for pastries and chocolates and crêpes, oh my! I've been searching for blogs to follow on the sites and sounds of Paris, so please share if you have any good tips! I'm making lists of places to see and things to eat!

I can't wait!

Au revoir!

Entry one.

I was nervous about this assignment, the thought of creating a personal blog. I've blogged in the past, I mean, I'm a twenty-something living in Nashville, the capital of young, hip, artistic and creative people. It was bound to happen. I think I quit because I felt less creative and more unoriginal.

It's a good thing this is an assignment and I'm being forced to write again. I'm pretty excited about it. I've had a lot of change in the last year or so, and there's more on the horizon. It will be nice to document the adventures ahead, in hopes that someone out there might laugh a little or be encouraged or stop a minute and think about something with different eyes. That's my motive, nothing hidden, nothing sneaky.

Adventure number one for this year-the arrival of a new puppy (in a very tiny city apartment, mind you). His name is Joaquin Phoenix (yes, we are those puppy parents) and he is roughly 10 weeks old. His breed, even better, is a mix between a Goldendoodle and a Labradoodle. That's what breeders call a Double Doodle. So, he's basically a teddy bear. We are proud parents, and he is one smart pup. Crate trained from the start, Joaquin is so well behaved, well, for the most part. My husband, Danny, has the discipline down pat. I try, but he's just so soft and cute, that it's difficult to do much reprimanding. When Danny is working, however, Joaquin gets a little sassy and likes nipping at his momma's hands and toes. I'm working on it, the more scratches the easier it's becoming!

I guess this is what we call the terrible two's...